Greetings from Southend-on-Sea, where in this low-budget crime thriller the "birds" turn tricks by the tuppence shuffle and the "geezers" scream obscenities at the mini-golf. For the money, Hughes's seaside hybrid of American noir and British gangster flick looks glossy, but the leaden plot – involving a monochrome gang of hard nuts and their molls doing each other in for a briefcase of cash – leaves us with nothing under the wrapper. The title's a confection cooked up to introduce the characters, who come in the usual flavours: mob boss Jimmy ("the mint imperial"); a pimp called Gerry ("the lime chocolate"); tart-with-a-heart Porsche ("the sherbet lemon"). At the lowest ebb, your mind wanders this imaginary sweet shop, browsing for a better title for a film as small, bitter and distasteful as this. Aniseed balls should do it.