Years ago an electrician came around to replace the light fittings at my ex-girlfriend’s all-female sharehouse. He walked in, announced he’d forgotten his toolbox, asked to use the bathroom and proceeded to take the largest, smelliest poo I have ever smelt or witnessed (no doubt the build-up of years of morning starts fuelled by ice coffees and servo meat pies).
He left the bathroom, excused himself before mumbling “someone else will come around to finish the job”, leaving what can only be described as a warzone in the girls’ bathroom.
There were screams, tears and laughter as the reality dawned on them that a random man had just walked in, taken a shit, then just left their house.
Still to this day I think about that as the funniest moment of my life.
ANYWAY, the internet is pretty funny as well and here are the 10 funniest things I’ve seen on it.
1. David Guetta ends racism
Without doubt the most tone deaf thing I’ve ever seen. I’m sure Guetta’s heart was in the right place, but my lord, this is a HUGE miss. The line “shout out to his family” will haunt my dreams for years to come. If this was written it would be some of the darkest comedy ever.
2. David Brent’s Free Love Freeway
One of my favourite pieces of comedy ever. If you’ve seen the UK Office you’ll know it well. When he says “seeeee … racial???” I giggle every time. Also the callback scene later in the episode when he says “go and get the guitar” might be the funniest comedy line ever written.
3. Simon Katich v Michael Clarke
Simon Katich vs Michael Clarke (2009, colorised) pic.twitter.com/HqUpS1Ozwf
— Ben Gardner (@Ben_Wisden) October 22, 2019
OK! This might be the most niche video on the internet but if you’re into cricket gossip, I think you’ll really get around this tweet.
4. Chelsea Peretti explains basic thirst trap theory
I came to Chelsea Peretti pretty late for someone in comedy and thank god I did because the special this clip is taken from is one of my favourites. She’s got great jokes, amazing act outs, her character stuff is brilliant but most importantly, she’s got funny bones. The perfect comedian.
5. Police chase, British-style (language warning)
— Happening 🔞 (@witzHappening) June 8, 2020
Maybe the most British thing I’ve ever seen. Excuse the bad language but I could watch this on repeat all day.
6. Steve Smith singing an original song
Forget sandpapergate, this clip has bought more shame on the nation than any moment on the cricket pitch. I don’t even know if it’s funny, to be honest. A must-watch!
7. Aaron Chen turning down an offer to join Cameo by sending a message from a Trump impersonator he found on Cameo
Chenny is so funny.
8. Tom Cashman being hardcore
When you’re not quite as hardcore but still want to have fun pic.twitter.com/cBEqV9feOV
— Tom Cashman (@_tomcashman) December 4, 2018
I do a podcast with Tom Cashman and I worry about him a lot. He can be incredibly reckless and have no care for his wellbeing sometimes. This is a perfect example.
9. Kevin Rudd trying to record a speech in Mandarin
Kevin used to get so angry before he could focus all his energy on bringing down the Murdoch media. Calm down, Kev!!
10. Man goes for a job interview at the BBC where they mistake him for a TV guest and interview him live on air
A classic video that I check in with every few years. His face at the start when he realises he’s in the wrong place is the most pure comedy I’ve seen.
• Sam Taunton is performing at the Comedy Store in Sydney on Friday 5 February and at the Melbourne Comedy festival from 25 March. Follow him on Twitter
