Will you watch I Love You Phillip Morris when it's released this week? Hard to say.
Just because it's a Jim Carrey film, that's no guarantee of anything. You could end up watching a broad knockabout comedy, but it could just as easily mean you'll get a patchy horror film about some scary numbers instead.
There's only one way to work out the quality of I Love You Phillip Morris – by gauging Jim Carrey's career trajectory so far to determine his current form.
▲ ACE VENTURA: PET DETECTIVE (1994)
Hey, who's this rubber-faced newcomer with an endless array of wacky voices and a slightly unsettling lack of basic human inhibitions? Why, Jim Carrey, if you stick to making harmless knockabout comedies for the rest of your life, you might just turn into a worldwide star!
▲ THE TRUMAN SHOW (1998)
Wait a minute, this film made us laugh AND cry! Maybe there's more to you than meets the eye, Jim Carrey. You're not the tiresome attention-seeker we first thought you were. You can actually act!
▲ MAN ON THE MOON (1999)
Hold on, this portrayal of Andy Kaufman is not only accurate, it's also heartbreakingly sincere. This is a revelation. Jim Carrey, you can act. You can really act!
▼ THE MAJESTIC (2001)
Oh God, that's too much acting. That's way too much acting. Enough already.
▲ ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND (2004)
Perfect. Jim Carrey, you've got the balance exactly right. The result – a downbeat, understated turn that roots this high-concept existential comedy firmly in the realms of reality – is exactly the sort of thing you should be doing. More like this, please.
▼ FUN WITH DICK AND JANE (2005)
Maybe you didn't understand us properly. By "more like this", we didn't mean "remake an unfunny George Segal comedy with David Duchovny's wife in a less funny way for no apparent reason". You're a well-respected actor now, Jim Carrey. For the love of God, save your reputation by making something a little more serious next time.
▼ THE NUMBER 23 (2007)
No. When we said serious, we meant another Spotless Mind, not an embarrassingly hamfisted horror about the world's spookiest number. You're a comedian at heart, Jim Carrey. Do another comedy and remind everyone why they originally liked you.
▼ YES MAN (2008)
No! We meant age-appropriate comedy, not a weird Liar Liar retread where you end up falling in love with a woman who's easily young enough to be your daughter! You're making a fool of yourself, Carrey! Do more acting!
▼ A CHRISTMAS CAROL (2009)
NO! Real acting, in a real film! Where you get to play a real person, not a cartoon of a gay Irish ghost candle! You're an idiot, Jim Carrey! Why can't you do anything right any more?
▲▼ I LOVE YOU PHILLIP MORRIS (2010)
Oh, God knows. It might be a good idea to just wait until it's on TV or something.