A fatuous, bafflingly imagined tale of the unhappy and unwell Beethoven and his ordeal in preparing the Ninth Symphony for its premiere. It is served up as a sort of platonic love affair: the stormy friendship between Beethoven (a bewigged Ed Harris) and his brilliant, beautiful, but entirely fictional young amanuensis and copyist Anna Holtz (Diane Kruger).

The chemistry supposedly fizzes and the sparks allegedly fly; the sassy young woman talks back to the grumpy old maestro who naturally comes to rely on her. The style has been pinched from Milos Forman's Amadeus: but the speculation about Mozart's relationship with Salieri was at least based on real people. "Anna Holtz" is entirely made up. So what's the point?