Well, us, mainly. But before we end the live portion of this blog, here are some things you can do tonight. That’s if you don’t already have plans. Do most people have plans already? You should be a bit more spontaneous, like.

MUSIC!
Go and see 60s psych types Temples (pictured, above) play at Rough Trade East, London, tonight – the record shop that incidentally named the remix version of the Sun Structures album their album of the year.

FILM!
Go and see Bill Murray’s Oscar-bait film, St Vincent, which is probably in a cinema near you RIGHT NOW and if it isn’t then you should do what any self-respecting modern person would do and tweet them your complaint.

TELLYBOBS!
BBC’s The Missing continues to win the award for Grimmest Thing On Telly as it hits its 6/8 episode stride. For everyone else, there are the easier-viewing delights of Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners or 17 Kids And Counting.

Good job everyone.

Now that the day’s slowing down, there’s time to admire Kanye West’s performance from the World AIDS Day performance for (RED) yesterday. Click the video and – don’t thank us, thank technology – we’ve fast-forwarded through the bits with Chris Martin and U2 already for you. Don’t go too far or you’ll get Bono.

Sadly, this being taken from a live stream, we don’t have the technology to improve the sound quality for you. But perhaps THIS GUY can. No guesses. It’s the guy from yesterday’s blog who made his own two-hour Yeezus fan video and basically inserted himself into Kanye’s tour. Because some people.

We love Broad City. It’s funny, fresh, feminist and the girls in it are all a bit endearingly rubbish at life. So when it comes to tedious Christmas parties, with their ironic festive jumpers, crappy covers playlists, all those tools from school that you never really wanted to see again, and a thin layer of grease from all the baked Iceland finger food hanging in the air, you know they’ve got your back.

Ready yourselves for their ultimate guide to surviving the holiday party season, starring fire, pharmaceuticals and rubbing yourself between two of the opposite sex like a jiggly dry-hump sandwich.

For the uninitiated, you can watch series one and two for free on YouTube HERE and it returns to Comedy Central in January.

While I’m busy setting up the Madonna Baps Exposure Support Group, here’s another clip from Birdman, the film that’s going to take a high flying crusty-white dump on all other films, when it finally comes out next month.

I say another like that because there have been, oh, I dunno, maybe 13445555 clips so far. Which is great for me because I still have no idea what’s really going on, or who Edward Norton’s character is. Except that he and Michael Keaton argue a lot and that Keaton packs a decent punch. It all looks very shouty and brilliant.

Then there’s this lot, too.

Or you can just ruin it all for yourself now and read Xan Brooks’s review of the film from earlier this year.

In lieu of my post ‘10 Artists You Should Like Who Are Better Than Ed Sheeran’, here are some lunchtime links for your eyes.

First, see what we have to look forward to at Christmas from Sky, as if Bake Off did a quirky murder mystery in the Cotswolds. Mums, aunties and cardigan enthusiasts will love it.

Then have a desk-rave to promising producer Ghost Culture’s new video, Giudecca, which is a little bit electroclash and therefore, by my logic, very good.

Read Luke Holland’s piece about the new American Horror Story: Freak Show series because someone’s got to and that’s what we’re all here for anyway. Still unconvinced? Watch the trailer, below, which is like a Marilyn Manson video in reverse.

And watch the trailer for Tim Burton’s Big Eyes and, in a weird new mangling of teaser trailer and lyric video, have a sing along with Lana Del Rey while you’re at it.

What does it take to make a successful pop song in 2014? The Guardian’s Harriet Gibsone had some thoughts on being a female pop star earlier this year in this video. But what of the things they sing? The modern-day pop song is more of a spaghetti-at-the-wall collage than an actual song, smooshed together in the hope that there’s something for all.

Just like the new Gwen Stefani track. Which is, broken down to its essence, also guide to how to do an uninspired big hit of 2014. You can almost hear the boxes being ticked in the boardroom as she raps ‘OMG’.

1// A rebellious title. But not too rebellious. It’s Katy Perry’s This Is How We Do. It’s Run The World. It’s Heal The World.

2// Something supercute. It’s hard to know where to start with Spark The Fire but I guess we’ll go with the anime characters. Kawaii is the new everything.

3// An unusual beat. You can’t just have any old beat these days. It needs to sound like rocking chairs creaking, or be carefully crafted from goat screams. Luckily, Pharrell has opted for a beat that sounds like spoons on saucepan lids. Which leads me onto…

4// Pharrell. You can’t release a pop song without Pharrell in there, somewhere. Stefani has him on the beats and the emojis. Two birds, one stone.

5// Internetty stuff. Gwen has discovered emojis. Emojis are the future. Everyone uses now emojis, right? OMG, so relevant.

6// Brands. I think there’s a massive nod to a certain make of car and a certain make of computer in there but I just can’t be sure. Anyway, the computer makes pizza so it can’t be real.

8// FEMINISM. Do not even think about releasing a modern pop song without a girl-power lyric in there. Luckily, Stefani has that NAILED.

No change there, then.

Fashion is just WILD, and when it collides with pop culture, anything can and does happen. It can get David Bowie to eyeball someone half his age. It can get Scarlett Johansson to sound like a bag lady at the back of the bus. And it can make Brad Pitt read poetry that’s 100% worse than what you wrote for GCSE English.

So here’s Chanel’s latest weirdfest, in which Pharrell and Cara Delevingne fart about on an empty dancefloor after being ‘reincarnated’ from a bell boy and a waitress into 19th century finery. Technically, you can’t be reincarnated if you’re still alive. But hey, fashion just bends the rules like that. The ‘song’ is probably the most annoying thing we’ve ever heard from Pharrell. More annoying than “bae” or that sexist song he did with that guy no one likes anymore. FASHION, BBZ!

A sombre start to the morning but we can’t be sweetness and light all the time guyz. In Things We Woke Up To This Morning news, indie-R&B raconteur Dev Hynes has soundtracked a short Ferguson protest film by Aaron Stewart-Ahn with some jazz-lounge piano improv, recorded earlier this year in Brooklyn. It’s no Palo Alto but, as an ‘ambient portrait’ of the unrest in America, it’s poignant stuff.